"Oh, there's just so much stuff. What am I supposed to do with all this stuff?" These were the words uttered by my overwhelmed Grandmother at the site of decades worth of belongings piled high in boxes that filled a garage. They were moving, and the truth was, most of their stuff had been hidden away in closets and cabinets and garages for much of their adult lives. It wasn't until my grandmother was met with the sight of everything all at once that she realized just how much she had.
"Well, it's 70 years worth of things, Grandma," I said, trying to reassure her that it wasn't as bad as she thought. "We'll just take it one box at a time. Don't worry about anything else." So we started with the "easy" boxes - the ones that had large items that weren't necessarily sentimental in value, just collected over time. Fortunately for us, she was an amazing record keeper and clearly labeled everything.
It didn't seem to matter how much we'd gone through and how many boxes we'd gotten rid of, when she would look around, she would feel so overwhelmed. I hid away the boxes, so she couldn't see what was left. "You don't realize how much progress you've actually made." So I would carry in one box at a time to an empty room so she could focus only on the task at hand and not be overwhelmed at the sight of what was left.
As we separated things into keep, donate, and trash bins, I made sure to immediately remove the donate and trash so she couldn't see it. This is key. Once you've made a decision to part ways with something, you can't second guess yourself by slowly pulling things back in. That's how clutter accrues, and that's how we lose the systems we had in place, and that's how we become overwhelmed.
Before long, you could see the floors of the closet that had once been stacked high with boxes. There was room to walk around, and the items kept were all very manageable and neatly labeled. It's hard to let go, but it feels so good when you do. Throughout the process, she'd recall stories I'd never known. For things worth remembering but not keeping, we'd take pictures.
Sadly, my grandmother passed away. But what made going through her belongings easier was knowing they were pared down to what really mattered. It wasn't hard to pass along heirlooms to the appropriate family member because we sorted what mattered and learned the stories behind the items that were kept.
My grandmother's legacy wasn't in the things that she had. It was in the person she was to those around her. While there are personal belongings of hers I will treasure, it's the memories and moments that really stick with me. And when she was free of the clutter, she had more time to spend with her family.
I'm very passionate about what I do because I've seen the effects decluttering and organizing can have on a person's well-being. It's easy to accrue things, but it's not easy to get rid of them. There were some really memorable stories tied to some of Grandma's things. But it wasn't until we removed the excess that I was able to learn about those stories. I don't want anyone to be left with feelings of guilt, shame, or overwhelm; but rather sweet memories of a life well-lived.
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